We look at God as though He is everything. And He is. But what we do not often realize is that He is also our friend. He is not just this all-powerful force doing things we can't understand, He really does love us. What most people don't realize is that God doesn't just allow bad things to happen. We live in an imperfect world with heartbreak and tragedy, but something you must realize is that God never wants any of this to happen. He is grieving along with you, so don't pull away from Him. I know it's very difficult to trust Him in hard times, but I promise you, He is there. And while He is grieving and heartbroken just like you, He is still stronger - and you need His strength. It hurts Him when you turn away. You are his treasure.
Feeling abandoned by God is something many, many people feel and it's understandable. I understand. So talk. Talk to Him and tell Him that. Ask Him how you can feel closer to Him. He is your God, not a monster - so don't be afraid to speak your mind. He is your friend and your Father and He will listen. He didn't give us life because He wanted us to be wind-up toys. Always remember that you are his child, and you are allowed to talk to Him not just as a god but as your father, your friend, your diary.
God does things in very interesting, sometimes subtle ways. Sometimes we don't think He answers, but only because it's not right in front of us. A nice day, an unexpected joy, a kind word... any and all of these are actually His answers, His comfort.... We just don't look hard enough.
The Bible is His and when you feel alone and abandoned by Him, read it. He will speak to you through it, even if you don't realize it.
Believing in God can be difficult sometimes, even if you were raised with it. There will always be people who disagree with you, or even make fun of you for your beliefs. But if you look around, you will realize that our world is incredible. Most people look at the big picture, at the imperfections of the world, but don't you see? There are so many things that shouldn't even be able to happen, yet do. The way animals can survive, the way our very hearts beat and our bodies heal..... None of it should even be possible. Not even remotely
I'm sorry - I feel as though I am rambling on, and I hate it when people do that. My message to you is this: Don't be afraid to talk to God. Don't pull away from Him in hard times, because you are under the misconception that He allows bad things to happen. He doesn't, and He hates it every bit as much as you do. He loves you and He will get you through this, if only you hold onto Him and don't let go.